Take me to church
by Lilith Fea
Summary: "There is this boy I met. His eyes are green; with so many layers and shades that they sometimes appear to be black. He doesn't like to be touched, and he doesn't smile too often either. His name is Elliot." Takes place during the 19 day gap, after Elliot meets with the FBI at Allsafe.
1. PROLOGUE

_**Prologue**._

 _"What I wouldn't give to be normal. To live in that bubble. Reality of the naive." He said. His eyes locked into mine. I could name every shade and hue of green and blue in his eyes if someone asked me to, know every line and feature on his face even in the dark, but the depth of the emotions he sometimes displays never ceases to surprise me. Each one longing to be named, to be recognized, but they go as fast as they came, gone within the blink of an eye._

 _"If you were like everybody else, then you wouldn't be Elliot, we never would've met, and I wouldn't be standing right here in front of you." He smiled, he doesn't smile very often, but when he does, his eyes turn the brightest shade of green. I touched his hand, half expecting him to flinch, or pull away, but he doesn't, and I continue to lace our fingers together. His palm was warm, his skin burning against my own, and there is a new kind of fire igniting within his gaze._

 _"You're right." He doesn't say anymore, and bites his bottom lip. I wonder if he feels the tension too, this indescribable heat between us that just keeps building and building, until we have to separate or else it will consume us._

 _"I always am..." I smiled at him, and I catch a glimpse of him looking down at my lips, our eyes meet again, and I feel him pulling me towards him, until there is no space between us. His scent is intoxicating, like soap and cigarette smoke, with just a hint of mint. His black hoodie feels worn and lovely beneath my touch as I find myself clinging to him, his lips suddenly pressed against my own._

 _I kiss him back, this feels right, so right that I start to think I might turn into a saint, if this keeps up. I moan into his mouth and his grip on my waist tightens, there would be bruises, I can tell, but I don't mind, as long as it's him. He takes this chance to deepen the kiss, pressing his tongue into mine, and I could taste him, the nicotine and mint driving me into a high. He lifted me up, his arm around my waist and the other gripping my ass, my thighs pressed against his hips. He carried me to his bed, not once breaking our kiss, even when he lowered me onto the mattress. We fit so perfectly, that I wonder if this is destiny, or perhaps some sick joke the universe decided to play on us. He thrust his hips, creating sweet friction between us, we are so close now. I never knew I could feel so exposed and naked, while fully clothed, until he looked at me, his eyes slowly undressing, his lips lightly caressing. And it was then that I realized how deliciously dangerous he is, how wonderfully wicked. He is sin wrapped in black cotton and nicotine. Oh, father forgive me for I have sinned._

* * *

 _Babe, there's something tragic about you,_

 _Something so magic about you._

 _Don't you agree?_

 _\- From Eden, Hozier_


	2. Ch 01 -Make it rain-

**Chapter one - Make it rain**

 _When the sins of my father w_ _eigh down in my soul,_

 _And the pain of my mother w_ _ill not let me go;_

 _Well, I know there can come fire from the sky, t_ _o refine the purest of kings._

 _And even though I_ _know this fire brings me pain,_

 _Even so, a_ _nd just the same._

 _\- Make it rain, Ed Sheeran_

* * *

"You ungrateful child!" I dropped to the floor. I could feel the sting her hand left on my cheek; burning like hot charcoal against my skin. "How dare you say that harlot's name in my household?!" Her voice dripping with poison and disgust.

"She's my mother, and your sister!" I said, I could taste blood in my mouth; the metallic taste adding to the bitterness in my soul. She huffed, I could almost see the jealousy tinting her skin green with envy, the hate in her eyes burning bright like a forest fire.

"Ha! Sister... She stopped being my sister when she sinned like a whore!" She gripped my face; her long, dragon-like fingernails digging into my skin. "You look just like her, and I hate her even more for it." She let go of my face harshly, and left me to wallow in self pity. I sobbed quietly, choking down my tears. I hate this place. Everything about this place makes me sick, even the air around me felt sickening with dread.

I clutched at my throat, struggling to breathe as I wept like a dog; tied down by a leash, trapped, helpless. I have nothing, I am nothing! I wanted to pull out all my hair, cut every vein in my body if that would fill the emptiness I feel in my chest. I looked around me, the lavishly decorated bedroom a reminder of the fact that they own me, a trophy of my father's Infidelity towards his wife, and a tool to fan my aunt's ever growing hatred for my dead mother. I want to burn it all, everything! Turn them all to ashes, from which they all came from. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. The sky crackled, lightning raking across the vast darkness. And in that moment I saw the world in a completely different light, I saw the world I could escape into if I could just scale this golden prison of mine. It would not be an easy life, but nothing could be worse than the one I have here. Nothing at all.

* * *

I stood beneath the shade of a Chinese shop front, rubbing my hands together; desperate for any source of warmth. I know I have nowhere to go, no one to turn to, but I would rather rot here on the streets than go back to my father and his abusive wife. The rain poured and thunder roared like a wild beast, but it doesn't frighten me, I have seen far worse things. Terrible things. I stood there for what seemed like hours, until my fingers felt like icicles, I wonder If my mother could see me now, and if she's shaking her head in pity, of what has become of her daughter; a homeless wreck, abused and degraded like a common street rat.

I sighed, looking up at the sky once again. "Hey!" A voice said, and I turn to look at the speaker. A boy, wearing a black hoodie stood beside me. He was just as soaked as I am, but something tells me that he doesn't mind the rain at all. He glanced down at the duffel bag at my feet, then back to me, he looked at me as if he wanted to say something.

"M-May I help you?" I asked, when he didn't speak. My voice trembled from the cold, and even that small mistake made me want to break down in tears. He didn't respond, just stared at me with an odd expression on his face, like he's contemplating something. "Is there something you want?" I grabbed my duffel bag, hugging it close to my chest. His unwavering stare made me even more aware of the situation I put myself in, but I don't want anybody's pity, especially not from this stranger.

"No, I just thought you looked... Lost." He said. I nodded my head, looking away from him and his wide eyes. I don't know what pushed me over the edge but soon tears started to fall, and I found myself crouching on the ground, weeping for dear life in front of this strange man.

"I'm sorry, its just been a really rough day. If it isn't obvious enough, I just ran away from home." I informed him as I wiped my tears with the sleeve of my coat. He seemed conflicted, like this is his first time seeing someone cry. I laughed like a lunatic, making him look even more confused than he already is. "Sorry, again. It's just that I don't even know you, yet I'm telling you all these things." I let out another laugh.

"Are you alright?" He asked cautiously. I nodded slightly, I shouldn't pester other people with my problems, but somehow telling this guy here, slightly lightened the burden on my shoulders.

"I'll be fine. Please don't let me hold you, I'm sure you have other things to do." I gave him a small smile, and looked the other way. He went on his way, and I closed my eyes, letting the sound of the rain wash away all my worries. I don't want to think anymore, I just want to disappear, let the ground swallow me whole. I listened to the cars passing by, and the people chattering about.

"Hey! I-If you need a place to crash, you can stay at my place." He came back. I was stunned by his words. Should I trust this guy? I eyed him suspiciously, contemplating what I should do. I know I'm no safer with him than out here, but still something kept tugging at the back of my mind, telling me to say yes. Maybe it's just the cold speaking, or his eyes that seem so dark yet not dark enough.

"What's the catch?" He shook his head, a small smile gracing his lips. And even though he smiled, I still caught a glimpse of loneliness in him.

"My therapist said I needed to work on my socializing skills." He said for lack of better excuses. I raised an eyebrow at him, before nodding. I followed him towards his apartment just a few shops away, we are soaking wet when we got to the front door.

"I'm Lilah, what's your name?" I had to shout over the pouring rain. He glanced at me over his shoulder as he inserts his key; holding the door open for me.

"Elliot." He didn't say anymore.

His apartment is located on the second floor. It was sparse, but warm and lovely. He had a pet fish and a few bookshelves stuffed with all sorts of books. It felt like a home; a very lonely home, but a home none the less. We stood in the middle of the living area for a while, the silence is awkward, pregnant with electric tension. He doesn't look at me, just keeps his eyes glued to the floor. I cleared my throat, dropping my bag by the small sofa. "Nice place." I said, unsure of what I should do next.

"Yeah." He snapped his head up, looking at me and pulling down his hoodie. His eyes are green, so undeniably green in the bright fluorescent lighting. And suddenly I am struck by how handsome he actually is.

"Um, do you mind if I use your bathroom?" I said, trying to fill the heavy silence. He shook his head, pointing me towards a door. I took my bag with me, he handed me a clean towel before leaving to give me privacy. I'm only staying for one night, then tomorrow I can go look for a place of my own, and maybe find a job. Yeah, just one night. You'll be fine Lilah, everything's going to be just fine.

* * *

"You can take the bed." He had changed out of his wet clothes, wearing a dark shirt and sweatpants.

"No, I couldn't, Elliot. It's only right I take the couch." I couldn't let him sleep on the couch, He'd already compromised his privacy by letting me stay here for the night.

"It's fine, I don't sleep all that much anyway." He stood up from his desk; grabbing a pillow and a spare blanket from the bed before proceeding to the couch. He sat there for a few seconds, just looking at me. I felt so exposed under his gaze, I pulled at the dark gray shirt he had lent me; the hem reaching just mid thigh, just enough to cover all the essentials. It felt worn and soft against my skin, and I found myself smiling like an Idiot as I gingerly climbed onto his bed.

"Goodnight..." He doesn't reply, but I know he heard me. I lay there for a few minutes, just listening to the light pattering of the rain outside. "Hey, Elliot?" I half whispered.

"Yeah?" He said, just as quietly, maybe even more so.

"Thank you for letting me crash here tonight." There was silence again, and the soft whisper of the rain.

"Okay." I heard him say, and I smile again; turning to my side and closing my eyes.

* * *

 _And let the clouds fill with thunderous applause,_

 _And let lightning be the veins_ _and fill the sky;_

 _With all that they can drop._

 _W_ _hen it's time t_ _o make a change_

 _Make it rain_

 _Make it rain down, Lord_

 _Make it rain_


	3. Ch 02 -Just tonight-

**Chapter two - Just tonight**

 _Do you understand who I am, do you wanna know?_

 _Can you really see through me?_

 _Now I have got to go._

 _\- Just tonight, The pretty reckless_

* * *

I stood at the front steps of Elliot's apartment, waiting for the rain to stop; the storm doesn't seem to be passing anytime soon. I frowned as I check the time on my phone, 11:34 AM. Elliot wasn't around when I woke up earlier this morning, I took it as a sign that it's time for me to go, I didn't want to impose on him any more than I already have. The rain pelted the streets like bullets; painting everything a gloomy shade of gray. I thought about my father and my aunt, they must've figured I left by now; I could already imagine the furious look on Aunt Clarice's face, and the dread in my father's eyes. I stared at my shoes, wondering when will things start looking up for me. I heard the sloshing of footsteps, I looked up and was met with vibrant Green eyes. Elliot. He looked at me oddly, a half smile played at his lips.

"Hey, you're back!" I said, the surprise evident in my voice. He nodded, and glanced down at the bag I held close to my chest, like he did the night before. He looked at me, his brows drawn together.

"Yeah, I just..." He paused for a moment, shoving a hand in the pocket of his hoodie. "I went out." He didn't say any more, we just stood there, looking at each other. The air around us is heavy, but not uncomfortable. Electric even.

"Listen, Elliot... Thank you again for letting me stay the night. I really appreciate it." I didn't know what else to say other than thank him. He nodded quietly, he doesn't speak very often. Maybe, that's a good thing because I'm not very good with goodbyes and I don't want to make this anymore awkward that it already is. "Well then, I should go."

"Wait, where are you going?" I turn back to him, smiling softly. His voice pulling me back. "I- I bought lunch." He held up a bag of Chinese take out. He looked as if this is his first time asking someone to have lunch with him, buying and sharing a meal with someone. I stared up at him, his eyes reflecting my own.

"Are you asking me to join you?" He shrugged his shoulders, I took it as a yes and nodded. The more I look at him, the more I see how guarded he really is. But I also see the cracks on his perfect wall, the loneliness quietly seeping through; unnoticeable if one doesn't look close enough. I know the feeling all too well.

The walk back up to his apartment was silent, the only sound that can be heard was the shuffling of our shoes against the scratched floorboards. He reached for his keys, and I noticed the slight tremor of his hands. I wanted to reach out and steady his hand, but I didn't. Instead, I pretended not to notice. He held the door open for me. I know it shouldn't have made me smile, something so simple and mundane, shouldn't have made my heart rate go up like a bullet train, shouldn't have made the blood come rushing to my cheeks. But it did.

* * *

Lunch was a quiet affair, much like any time spent with Elliot. I wonder if he's like that with everyone, always keeping to himself, closed off from the world, only his eyes betray his presence. I know I shouldn't ponder over him too much, I'm probably never going to see him again after today, I shouldn't get too attached. I washed the plates, while he dried them. I could feel his shoulder softly brushing against mine, I didn't miss the slight flinch, he gave before composing himself once more. I inched away from him a little, not wanting to overstep his line of comfort. I suddenly recalled a time with my father, he too often flinched away from me, at first it confused me, I thought he hated me, but as it turns out he only hated what I became. They always did say I look a lot like my mother, and it unnerved my father. The memory brought with it an old kind of pain; one that I tried to bury long ago. I swallowed the lump in my throat, blinking away the tears.

"So, what's with the fish?" I asked, trying to fill the silence with idle conversation. Elliot seems like the kind of guy who rarely talks about personal stuff, I wouldn't want him to think I'm prying, so his pet fish should be a safe place to start.

"My next door neighbor gave it to me." He said. I smiled, I felt happy that his neighbor was thoughtful enough to give him a companion, even if its a fish. I don't know why, but somehow I feel sad for this strange boy. Maybe it's the lack of photos and picture frames hanging on his walls, or the lonely air of solitude that surrounds him, no matter what he does. Or maybe it's because I empathize with him, I see the same look in his eyes that I saw in my eyes everyday when I still lived with my Aunt and father.

"That was very nice of them. Does it have a name?" I handed him another plate, our fingers don't touch, but I felt him pause for a brief moment; it was so short I barely even noticed it.

"Qwerty." He answered. I could feel him looking at me, but I try not react, keeping my attention on the soapy sponge in my hands.

"That's a curious name." I laughed. "I used to have a pet puppy named mops, but he died when I was nine." I said as casually as I could, I remember mops, he was so energetic, always running around, getting into trouble. Aunt Clarice hated him though. "But, that was a long time ago..." I closed the tap, wiping my hands on a kitchen towel. It was still raining.

"You said you ran away from home, why?" His question caught me off guard, I didn't have time to compose myself. I smiled bitterly to myself, it's funny how he doesn't speak very often, but when he does talk, it always hits a home run. I turned to him, leaning against the sink.

"I can't really tell you all the details right now. Let's just say, one day I realized how sickening my life was and I needed an escape, so I ran away." That was the only answer I could think of, one that was not a lie, but without all the gruesome details of my sad little existence. I never want to relive such moments ever again, and I would like it better if Elliot or anybody else never see that part of my life. He didn't say anything else, but his expression made me feel like he knows something, but I didn't ask him about it. I cleared my throat, as I looked around his small apartment. "Hey Elliot, do you mind if I stay here for a while, just until the rain stops, after that I promise I will be out of your hair."

"I don't mind." He smiled, and I felt my heart flutter for a brief moment. I try not to ponder over these feelings I get when I look into his eyes, I don't want to read into all of this too much. An attachment is the last thing I want right now. I sighed, turning my attention towards the bookshelves lining his bedroom wall. I stepped a little closer, reading the titles on the spines. Most of them were books I've never even heard of, while some were familiar classics. I wonder if he reads any of these books, I let my fingers trail the spine of a leather bound volume, smiling at the softness of the worn cover, he definitely reads them.

"Hey, Elliot!" A muffled voice came from behind the door. Elliot didn't answer immediately. The person pounded against the door, rousing an annoyed groan from him.

"What Shayla?!" He said, almost harshly, but the woman didn't even blink and casually strode into the threshold.

"Oh, I didn't know you had a guest. Anyways, I just came here to borrow some sugar, I'm all out and it's a Saturday, and you know I don't like going to the store on Saturdays because my douche bag of an ex works there on Saturdays." She blabbered on, she didn't even stop to see the frustrated look on Elliot's face. He handed her the sugar and asked her to leave, his voice firm and low. The sound sent shivers down my spine. "Okay, okay! I'm leaving!"

He sighed after closing the door, sitting down on the couch. "She seemed nice." I giggled, turning my attention back to the bookshelves. I glance down at the clock near the bed, 5:45 PM. I should leave, I went to grab my things when suddenly the lights went out. I walked back to the living area, bumping into everything, when I collided with Elliot, He groaned in pain as we fell on the hardwood floor. I had him pinned to the ground, our limbs tangled together. "Sorry..." I whispered, as I found his eyes in the darkness. "Are you okay?" Somehow the dark made it feel as though we needed to speak in hushed voices.

"I'm fine." His voice was low, and I could feel his breath on my cheek, brushing over my lips. We are so close I could almost taste him, he felt warm against the coldness of the dark. I swallowed the lump in my throat and my mouth felt so dry. I tried to get up, but regretted it quickly. I winced in pain as my hair got caught in the zipper of his hoodie. Shit! "What's wrong?" He asked.

"My hair is caught." I sighed. " We have to pry it out, or cut my hair, shit! I really don't want a haircut right now." I lifted myself up on my elbows, and felt his hand on my arm, steadying me. I could feel the hairs on my body stand on end, and it excited and frightened me at the same time. I tried pulling at the zipper of his hoodie, but it only made it worse. Damn it! I pulled at the hair, that didn't work either. I gave up and slumped back onto Elliot, I felt his body tense up against me before slowly relaxing. I buried my face in the crook of his neck, I don't know what possessed me to do it, but he just felt so... So human. Warm, breathing, unlike the cold, robotic man I thought him to be when I first saw him just the previous night.

I felt him wrap an arm around me, and I sank deeper into his warmth. He smelled like soap and cigarettes, and strangely enough I love it. He maneuvered us carefully in the dark until we were sitting on the floor, I sat between his legs, still nestled against him. Isn't this strange; We barely even know each other, yet here we are pressed together in the dark, on the cold floor of his lonely apartment. If this isn't fate, then I don't know what is. "Hold still, I'm going to pry your hair out of the zip. Lean in a bit so I don't accidentally pull at your hair." I heard him say, something about his tone made me grip the sleeve of his hoodie. I leaned into him, my face pressed against his collar bone as his nimble fingers worked the zip. Soon my hair was free and the lights -so conveniently- suddenly turned back on. Our eyes locked together, his were wide and alive with color and light. Each layer and hue etching itself into my mind, burning itself into memory. God, he's beautiful!

"You can crash here tonight, if you want, Lilah." He whispered. I didn't realize how tightly I was clutching at his sleeve, I was paralyzed. The look on his face, knocking the breath right out of my lungs. And the way he said my name stirred something in me.

"This is the last time, I promise. Just tonight." I said, I watched as his Adam's apple bobbed up and down his throat as he swallowed thickly. I licked my lips. He nodded. Yes, this was the last time, I swear. Just tonight.

And I knew deep down that this won't be last of anything...

* * *

 _Just tonight, I won't leave,_

 _And ill lie and you'll believe._

 _Just tonight,_

 _I will see that its all because of me_


	4. Ch 02 point 5 -Snuff-

**Chapter 2.5 - Snuff (Elliot)**

 _Bury all your secrets in my skin,_

 _Come away with innocence, and leave me with my sins._

 _The air around me still feels like a cage,_

 _And love is just a camouflage for what resembles rage again..._

 _\- Snuff, Slipknot_

* * *

It's been two days since I handed out Colby's IP address to the FBI, and still no change. There was no revolution, no great war against evil Corp. Did I make a mistake? Shit! This is a slippery slope, what have I done?! I just framed an innocent man, destroyed his career, his life; like Ron from the coffee shop, I deleted him.

It's almost midnight now, and the rain is pouring harder than ever, maybe I should have brought an umbrella, but that's just a technical thing and I don't really mind the rain. I could almost see my apartment now, but something caught my eye; a girl stood by old man Chang's shop front, shivering from the cold. The duffel bag at her feet explains it all, a teen runaway, not really a rare sight in these parts of town. Should I talk to her? Probably not, greetings aren't really one of my strong points, she'll just get pissed at me and tell me to fuck off, I often receive that reaction from people. Yeah, I should just walk past her, head hung low and eyes to the ground. But my feet carried me closer and closer to where she was firmly planted, and before I could stop, It was already too late. My mouth ran faster than my thoughts.

"Hey!" The surprised look on her face caught me off guard, making me falter and squander for words. Like I said, greetings aren't my strong point. I couldn't find the words to say, what should I do next? Maybe I should back away from this situation while I still can, the look in her eyes stopped that thought immediately. They were a warm Hazel, almost golden under the dim glow of the streetlights, they reminded me of the sun. That sounded a bit too poetic, Krista would've been proud if she had heard it.

* * *

I don't know what possessed me to offer her a place to crash for the night, maybe it was her eyes, so wide and warm that I had to supress a shiver when they locked into mine. We had walked side by side to my apartment, our arms did not brush, but I could feel her presence, her heat almost searing my skin through my soaked hoodie. She said her name is Lilah, I don't really know how I feel about her name, every girl I seem to know has a name that ends with the same sound; Angela, Shayla, Krista and now Lilah. Something about it bugs me.

"Nice place..." Her voice reminded me of her presence. Lilah stood in the middle of the sparse room, her eyes roaming the entire vicinity before meeting with mine. She seem to really like doing that, looking me straight in the eyes. She's trusting, a major flaw, but somehow I like it. I like knowing people's bugs, her's is her naivete and easy trust.

"Yeah." I pulled down my hoodie, my hands trembled, I could feel the anxiety seeping back in. There really isn't much I could do to ease my mind at this moment, maybe I shouldn't have invited her over after all. If she's here I can't have my morphine. Again, another slippery slope.

* * *

The grey shirt played with my mind like a damn circus. Maybe I should've given her some sweatpants too, her creamy thighs peeking just beneath the hem of that blasted shirt, just low enough to cover her sloping hips. I swallowed the none existent lump in my throat. I watched as she slowly crept over to the bed, _my bed_ , I had insited she take the bed, but maybe that was a mistake, I should've asked to share it instead.

God, I need to sleep off these thoughts, I just met her after all, but something about her irks me, like an itch I'm just dying to scratch. I'm curious. The rain hadn't stopped, the light pattering against the window panes accompanied by her calm breathing, soothed my frayed nerves. This feels different, a good kind of different.

"Hey Elliot?" Lilah's quiet voice broke the silence, her tone hanging limply in the air. I stared at the ceiling, thoughts still running rampant in my head.

"Yeah?" I waited for her answer, I heard the shuffling of pillows and sheets as she repositioned herself, the thought of her midnight hair sprawled over the dark gray sheets sparked something in me. Like a virus slowly eating at me from the inside.

"Thank you for letting me crash here tonight." Her voice somehow made the rain sound lovelier than it was, what as strange thought. God, that's lame. I really should stop pondering over such things. But still my curiosity will not be sated until I know everything there is to know about her, I'll hack her soon enough, I always do.

"Okay." I said with a sigh. Maybe a cold shower would clear my mind of these thoughts.

* * *

The power had gone out, and we were bathed in absolute darkness. _If_ it was any other day I wouldn't have minded, maybe even found comfort in the stillness of the dark, but not today. Today I woke up to the sight of a sleeping girl in my bed, wrapped in _my sheets and my shirt_. And now, the same girl is nestled against me on the cold floor of my apartment; her hair caught in the zip of my hoodie.

 _Lilah_ , what a common name, but different at the same time; a contradiction. She's warm and soft in my arms and she smells like lilacs and lavenders, or is it just in my head? I don't like touching people, but this feels right. Good even, so good that it keeps scratching that part of my mind, the part that doesn't allow good to exist without a condition. What would it cost me to have her...

This is a slippery slope.

* * *

 _"It frightened him to think what must have gone to the making of her eyes."_

 _\- Edith Wharton, The age of innocence_

* * *

 ** _AN: Hello my darlings! Thank you for all the wonderful feedbacks and response to this little fic! You guys are beyond awesome, and I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while and that this latest updated is pretty short, but I really do appreciate everything you guys do to show your support for this story, so again, Thank you, thank you and THANK YOU! I hope you enjoyed reading this so far._**


	5. Ch 03 -Like real people do-

**Chapter 03 - Like real people do**

 _I will not ask you where you came from_

 _I will not ask you and neither would you_

 _Honey just put your sweet lips on my lips_

 _We should just kiss like real people do_

 _HOZIER - Like Real People Do_

* * *

The hours passed in silence. Like the night before, Elliot lent me another one of his old shirts, and I slept on his bed. The sheets were cold but it smelt like him, it was an odd sort of comfort, knowing he was there with me, a stranger and a companion. He is being extra quiet tonight and the blurred streetlights outside his apartment window lulls me into a fitful sleep.

* * *

She was sobbing, like she always does when father comes to visit. The living room was dark, and I could hear their voices through the thin walls, mother and father, they are fighting again and father kept yelling profanities. I know this scene from somewhere, from a time long ago. I've seen it somewhere before. I pressed my ears closer to the wall, catching little words here and there. Words like 'burden' 'whore' and 'slut' were thrown about, I felt my heart racing, the fear and the pain lacing together inside me. I know this scene, I know what's coming up next... Then a gunshot rang through the empty house, echoing through the cracks and into every crevice. And then there was blood, her blood, my mother's blood soaking her favorite persian rug, seeping through the hardwood floors...

* * *

"No!" I screamed, cold sweat running down my neck and into Elliot's borrowed shirt. I blinked once, twice before realizing where I was, Elliot's apartment. The place was dark and cold as usual but the dream gave the darkness an extra edge, and it made my skin crawl with fear. It was such a long time ago since I last had a dream about my mum's death, the resurfacing memory made bile rush up to my throat. It made me want to throw up, all the blood and her dead, dull eyes.

"Lilah..." My head snapped to attention. It was Elliot. The sound of his voice calling out my name gave me some form of relief. "Are- are you alright?" It was nothing more than a whisper but it reminded me that he is there, that I am safe in his home.

My throat felt like a desert storm had just been in it, making my voice crack when I tried to speak. Fear had gripped my heart so tightly I could barely breathe. I got up from the bed, the springs in the mattress crying out in protest and I could hear Elliot shifting in the worn sofa from the other room. Screw the fact that he is nothing but a stranger, that we barely know a thing about each other, right now I couldn't care less as I went to the living room, my footsteps carrying me faster than I thought possible to where he was.

Elliot looked up at me with his wide green eyes. "Bad dream?" He asked, as if already knowing what just took place inside my head. I nodded in reply, and we stared at each other a moment longer, a beat of silence passing between us. I don't know where I got the courage to do what I did next; I sat down on the sofa and nestled into Elliot. He stiffened momentarily before relaxing into my embrace. It was odd, and weird and strange, but still he was warm and solid, and I needed something to hold on to.

"Things..." He started hesitantly, "Things like this, I'm not good at them." I didn't mind, he say things like that and often avoid contact, but right now he is all I have and his shaky hand tracing nervous circles around my shoulder made it impossible for me to pull myself away from him. I noticed, not for the first time that his scent is absolutely intoxicating, like cigarets and cheap aftershave. I buried my face into his neck, seeking his warmth.

"I hope you don't mind, but just for a little longer." I whispered quietly, clutching at his shirt with a death grip.

"I don't mind. Just let me try something." He said, almost breathless now. I looked up at him, starring into his vibrant green eyes, the same ones that found me on the streets two nights ago. He held me closer, our bodies fitting together perfectly as I sat between his legs on the sofa, his back against one of the arm rests. I noticed the way his Adam's apple bobbed up and down his throat as he swallowed thickly, the movement entranced me. I licked my lips, his gaze following the action.

Before I knew it I felt Elliot's lips pressed firmly against my own. The first touch felt like a thousand thunderbolts hitting me at once, and I knew he felt it too. The slight shudder he gave was testament that the feeling was mutual. So this is what it's all been leading up to, all the heated glances and the electric atmosphere, everything. His lips lingered on mine, and when I didn't pull away Elliot kissed me again, his hand fitting perfectly at the base of my neck. His mouth moved against mine, and I could taste him. God, I could taste him. And when his tongue brushed over mine I couldn't suppress the moan from escaping my throat. I felt heat rising to my face at the sound of my own voice, wanton and willing to let him taste me. And taste he did. Every lick and every bite was like a drug to me. He tasted like nicotine and mint with a hint of something sweet. When he finally pulled away from lack of air I felt like I was in a daze, his lips still touching mine but not enough to be a kiss. I breathed him in, all thoughts of my nightmare now buried at the back of my mind.

Right now there is only Elliot, and the way he kissed me so desperately as if he would suffocate without me. "Do you kiss every girl you meet on your way home?" I asked almost teasingly. He grinned, showing off his perfect white teeth.

"No, this is a first." He answered truthfully, his calloused thumb brushing against my bottom lip. The touch made me shiver. The impulse to kiss the digit was almost overwhelming but I refrained myself from doing so.

"Good, cause this is a first for me too."


End file.
